It’s that time of the year
It’s that time of the year
imagine if china, while they’re up on the moon, decides to knock down the US flag or whatever just to say ‘screw you’ and its like, what are we gonna do? spend a couple million just to fly some craft up to the moon and re-erect the flag? the whole scenario would be petty and that’s hilarious
i have lived in america my entire life and i am 100% sure we would do exactly that
Real-life Clint Barton.
This is literally my fourth or fifth time reblogging this.
It’s still hillarious.
One of my favorite lines
I kinda feel like the writers wrote this line specifically to drive the kind of fans who want to figure out how sci-fi tech would theoretically work crazy. They’re like “nope! We’re not going to give you any techno babble to tear apart or investigate or mull over to tell us how we’re doing it wrong, or how it compares in effectiveness to similar tech in other franchises.”
I also feel like this is one of those times when the TARDIS’s translation circuit just gave the fuck up. Like the ‘physics physics physics’ scene, where he is imparting secrets of the universe and the TARDIS is like THERE ARE NO WORDS FOR THIS IN ENGLISH DAMN IT DOCTOR OH HELL FUCK IT.
OH MY GODS she TOTALLY edits his speech. I be he actually swears a fuckton but the TARDIS is like THERE ARE CHILDREN
895. Muggleborns wonder why there’s a large group of friendly, teenage ghosts around Hogwarts. They’re led by a funny boy with red hair and one ear who likes to joke around with Peeves, and he always says that they’re Dumbledore’s Last Army.
This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.
CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:
- do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
- go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
- if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
- look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
- the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
- works every time
"sad little bug" is the cutest and most accurate term ive heard used to describe a child because sometimes bugs are kinda super cute sometimes bugs are really fucking annoying and sometimes bugs are downright TERRIFYING
This functional bra can hold most cellphones, IDs, and other small items regardless of bust size. Items won’t change the way the bra fits you. Currently on sale at Amazon!
OK I REALLY WANT TO BE KISSING A GIRL AND THEN I TAKE OFF MY SHIRT AND SHE’S LIKE “CUTE BRA” AND I CAN SAY “THANKS IT HAS POCKETS”
the game has changed forever
THIS IS THE BEST IDEA EVER
first item of clothing for girls that has pockets.
obama just does not give a fuck anymore and it is hilarious
Obama isn’t perfect but congress is a joke.
Everybody blames him for shit when they really need to look at Congress.
I don’t care how you feel about his politics, but you have to admit he’s hilarious.